Dear Ms Swift,
First let me congratulate you on aiming your gorgeous and pricy designer sandal to kick Apple Music in the Bramleys. Taylor Swift, you are a flaxen haired end-of-level-boss, Kerpow! A spindly but mighty gladiator, Thwack!
You unleashed the hell dogs of 300 sweaty lawyers and a sprinkle of tweets to do battle to secure what was truly your birthright; your royalties for three months of Apple Music streaming.
But have I a bone to pick with you and your talented musical chums. I’m guessing your earliest musical purchase didn’t involve a bus trip to musty high street retailer Our Price to buy your first ever vinyl (Off The Wall by Michael Jackson since you ask), only to purchase it again on cassette, later on CD, again through iTunes and a myriad of streaming services (don’t even get me started on compilation albums).
I dare say when the ability to download music straight to a widget in your brain finally arrives, it will have me purchasing the same track listing yet again, paid for this time in synaptic MindCoins.
“I just don’t agree with perpetuating the perception that music has no value and should be free,” you argued in a spat with Spotify last year and I’m right with you girlfriend. Only I don’t agree that I should be paying for tracks several times over either. So who’s going to rumble in the jungle and dance like a kick-ass butterfly for me, hmmmm?
1) Festival Fumblings Up↑
Solve the traditional ‘where’s the tent?’ angst with free app OS Locate which helps you mark the location of really important things then directs you back there.
2) Your friend; Gmail unsend Up↑-
Giving us 30 seconds of soul searching should be ample to decide whether you really should have sent that email to your ex or worse, your boss.
3) Give Google a miss Down↓
Googling medical woes could be bad for your health GPs say, so bypass Google altogether and head to a reputable site such as NHS Choices or Patient.info
4) Apple Pay it backward Down↓
Apple Pay; wonderfully convenient for iPhone 6 owning Britons (#yay!), however Japanese folk have been doing this for more than a decade (#whatevah)
5) Snoopers Charter Down↓
The Government’s plans for more power to spy on us. Tim Berners-Lee wants a 21st Century Magna Carta, only with more on rights to privacy and less about troublesome Baron rebellions.
Amanda Horlington is the founder of web design and internet marketing company Fusion Marketing. Contact Amanda at firstname.lastname@example.org or via Twitter.